youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
