Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
