He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
