so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
