He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize