am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize