Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
