i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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