I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
