Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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