Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
