Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm getting married
To pizza
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
