i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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