Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize