And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I cannot find my penis.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Randomize