ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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