just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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