He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
