Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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