I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
