chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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