found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Randomize
