Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
