Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
