question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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