hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Randomize
