I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I can tuck mytits in my pants
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
