I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
