Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Randomize
