Sry I called you an 8
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Randomize
