He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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