Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
