Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
