It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
