this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
