Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
