We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
