when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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