She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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