he wants to bone in the snuggie
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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