She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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