My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
