The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
My friends, they love my intelligence
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Randomize
