I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
