At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
