Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
