every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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