you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
