Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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