Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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