I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Randomize
