i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
