seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
